Mascara

Dear mascara manufacturers, let's be perfectly honest here shall we and talk about branding and the dishonestly of your marketing department- since when does False lash effect/ doe eyed lashes like bambi/ super dooper long lustrous come hither lashes= equate to what I have in my little stumpy lashes this morning. May I be so pertinent as to suggest a rebrand claiming, "No extra length guaranteed, just clumpy little lumps of what looks like mouse droppings adorning your upper lids and the added bonus of spots of black all over your upper lids (thus I am now a human Dalmatian). If you could kindly arrange this then that would save me from such a disappointment- or at the very least a disclaimer to state *that by the application of this product you will not transform into Grace Kelly although test results have shown in some cases a Lilly Savage effect has been known. Thank you